Category: oh…just me

I know I am Connected

I know I am connected because I understand the volatility of this spring is evidence...because my life's work is relevant...when someone mistakes me for a nurse...birdsong wakes me...patience permeates my senses and expands my pores...when I tell people what I do and they continue to talk...I am connected even when I am unable to discern the connection. I am connected.
I know I am connected because I understand the volatility of this spring is evidence...because my life's work is relevant...when someone mistakes me for a nurse...birdsong wakes me...patience permeates my senses and expands my pores...when I tell people what I do and they continue to talk...I am connected even when I am unable to discern the connection. I am connected.

Infinitely Tender

Most of my lessons the past year have involved living with uncertainty. Against the desire for permanence Andrea Fella reminds us, "Things are ending all the time." Too often my sentiment has been one of 'always saying goodbye' - as expressed in Rilke's 8th Duino Elegy. This is, ironically, quite the opposite of the attitude I prefer: "I don't care if I am possible . . . " (Ursula LeGuin, "Newton Did Not Sleep Here"). Farewell 2011, full of unclear memories yet infinitely tender. No clinging to reflections in the mirror; all things change – are always, forever, changing. "Impermanence . . . is the one thing really worth seeing, for one who fully sees it in himself is Free" (Phra Khantipalo).
Most of my lessons the past year have involved living with uncertainty. Against the desire for permanence Andrea Fella reminds us, "Things are ending all the time." Too often my sentiment has been one of 'always saying goodbye' - as expressed in Rilke's 8th Duino Elegy. This is, ironically, quite the opposite of the attitude I prefer: "I don't care if I am possible . . . " (Ursula LeGuin, "Newton Did Not Sleep Here"). Farewell 2011, full of unclear memories yet infinitely tender. No clinging to reflections in the mirror; all things change – are always, forever, changing. "Impermanence . . . is the one thing really worth seeing, for one who fully sees it in himself is Free" (Phra Khantipalo).

Jackshit Rainbow

At the grocery store, I had just snatched up a bunch of bananas when someone said, "Hi." (Yes, Lucasz started it.) He was stocking in the produce section. I was surprised by how happy he seemed. I had felt assailed when we entered the store – the smell was incredible – like someone had sprayed powdered sugar in the air. I remembered someone in Antwerp telling me a story about an immigrant who, after years of labor had finally earned enough to bring his mother over. When she arrived, he took her to the weekend market, where she burst into tears, inconsolable at the sight of so much excess when she had scrabbled along her entire life on so much less.
At the grocery store, I had just snatched up a bunch of bananas when someone said, "Hi." (Yes, Lucasz started it.) He was stocking in the produce section. I was surprised by how happy he seemed. I had felt assailed when we entered the store – the smell was incredible – like someone had sprayed powdered sugar in the air. I remembered someone in Antwerp telling me a story about an immigrant who, after years of labor had finally earned enough to bring his mother over. When she arrived, he took her to the weekend market, where she burst into tears, inconsolable at the sight of so much excess when she had scrabbled along her entire life on so much less.

Making It Real

Tribute.


All grown up and ready to lead, shake it up!

Make it real – compared to what?

Getting shot at, it’s all left up to us.

The hip hop generation, our generation

We’ve got the longevity, educated enough to know

No time for sorrow, gotta share all the love

Love the way it should be.

Not let our minds … Read more...

as she wished

I settled on roses because peonies are out of season. (Mom's mother, Rosaline, used to take peonies on family outings to her parents' graves on Memorial Day.) The lavender was broken by the hot air balloon upon landing; the bit of sage was a gift from Ceremony. A male goldfinch had greeted me in Caroline's yard upon return from Ceremony, and the necklace was a perfect find at Mama's Minerals.
I settled on roses because peonies are out of season. (Mom's mother, Rosaline, used to take peonies on family outings to her parents' graves on Memorial Day.) The lavender was broken by the hot air balloon upon landing; the bit of sage was a gift from Ceremony. A male goldfinch had greeted me in Caroline's yard upon return from Ceremony, and the necklace was a perfect find at Mama's Minerals.

She sang!

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Elaine Johnson Kent
August 18, 1934 – September 30, 2009

Mom and I had many conversations in the 1990s about euthanasia. She was afraid of pain and did not want to suffer. I took a bunch of notes back then … Read more...

juxtapositions

Rio Rancho (Albuquerque), New Mexico

Americans smile a lot. It feels good! 🙂 Occasionally someone gives a fake smile, one of those that is offered up because it is socially expected, but most of the smiles are accompanied with eye contact that acknowledges, somehow, what a pleasure it is to recognize mutual presence. No more carefully-controlled neutral (or somewhat suspicious) … Read more...