I had lunch today with an old dear friend – over a decade by golly! Who at one point (after I made some nonsensical polite “filler” type of comment) laughed heartily at my cultural non-deaf-ness. 🙂 Then, she said I really am “deaf” though, in the sense of being estranged from family. She was referring to my family of origin, with whom my ties are tighter now than in many, many years, but which never nurtured a deep sense of belonging. She likened this to the experience of that vast majority of deaf individuals born into non-deaf families, and the seemingly inevitable distances that arise because of language acquisition issues and a range of phenomenological differences.
Marvin Marshall once told me I had a “deaf heart” which is dang near the highest praise any non-deaf person could ever hope to receive. He was a sweetheart. Died a few years ago. 🙁 Got death/dying on my mind today. Just posted some more about Mary Frances. Re-read a “requiem” for her and this line jumped out at me:
“She said it out loud. You always said it out loud.” So True! 🙂
And my pal and I today reminsced about others who’ve gone on – Charlie Tummino, for one. Some of our relatives.
There was a bunch of other stuff we talked about too – modes of consciousness and groovy stuff like that. 🙂 It was a wonderful way to spend the afternoon.